I knew it was a mistake when the words came out of my mouth. But unbidden, they slipped out of my thoughts and into the cold light of day.
“You don’t talk to me. Not when we are in the car. Not when we go out to eat. And not even at our own dining room table.”
photo by G. Altman-Pixabay
“What are you talking about? I talk to you all the time. Why, just this morning, I asked you if there was any coffee left and if you had washed my Hawaiian shirt, the one with the dragon on it?”
Katie looks at him with her eyes wide in disbelief. “You know that’s not what I’m talking about, Ron. I mean real conversation—the kind most men have with the wives that they supposedly love—the kind where you share your thoughts, your dreams, your hopes, and desires.”
“You want to hear about my thoughts, hopes, and dreams? Since when? I’m lucky if you ask me what I would like for dinner before I leave for work in the morning.”
“Ron, believe it or not, I am not your housekeeper or the cook. My sole purpose in life is not to wait on your hand and foot. I’m a real person with needs and wants.”
“What needs and wants? I work ten hours a day and come straight home every night. I don’t stop at the bar to drink a cold one—not that I wouldn’t like to—I sure would. The first thing I ask you when I walk into the door is how is dinner coming along.”
“Yeah, Ron, it’s every woman’s dream for her loving husband to come home and ask if dinner is ready yet. Do you know what I wish? I wish that I had married someone else. Anyone else? He wouldn’t have to be rich, although I wouldn’t mind that. He would just have to be a sweet, kind man who loved me and wanted to spend time talking to me. Is that too much to ask?”
“So maybe I should quit my job and stay home to keep you company all day. Of course, I don’t know how we’ll pay our bills and take that vacation you are always talking about. And then there’s the deck you wanted me to build this summer. I won’t be able to afford to do that either.”
“Ron, I never said you should quit your job. I ask if you could spare some of your TV time and actually talk to me or even have a real conversation at dinner.”
“Ok, ok, tonight we’ll have a real conversation. Wait, we just had a real conversation. So, we don’t have to converse until tomorrow night. Meanwhile, I’ll consider what to talk about. I will go in the bathroom until dinnertime and give it some deep thought. Just give me a holler when dinner is ready. See ya later.”
At dinner, Ron eats his meatloaf and mashed potatoes in record time. “Ok, Katie, I’ll see you later. I have previous plans tonight. I think I mentioned to you that Kyle and I will meet at the Hockey Puck to watch the game tonight and toss back a few.”
” No, you didn’t, Ron, but tomorrow night, you’re all mine. No TV, no internet, no Hockey Puck.”
“Yeah, yeah I’ll be home late, I’ll try not to wake ya.”
Katie watches Ron run up the stairs. About two minutes later, he comes down wearing his favorite hockey team shirt. He gives her a backhanded goodbye wave and is out the door.
Katie starts clearing the table and loading the dishwasher. She lets out a heavy sigh. She bathes and then goes to bed with one of her love stories.
The next evening, Ron comes through the front door and calls out, “Hey honey, I’m home.” His impulse is to ask what’s for dinner, but he suppresses it. Instead, he walks into the kitchen and gives his wife a kiss on the cheek and a shoulder hug. “Hey, how are you? How was your day?”
Katie looked over at Ron to see if he was serious and noticed he was no longer standing there. At first, she questions her sanity. She considers the possibility that she imagined the whole thing. No, he was here, gave her a kiss and a shoulder squeeze, and asked her how her day was, and the next thing she knew, he disappeared. She looks all around the kitchen, and he is just not there. Katie shakes her head from side to side. Trying to make sense of it. She calls out, “Ron, are you there? Where are you?”
“I’m right here; I just had to make a pit stop in the head to take a leak.”
“Oh, I thought I was losing my mind for a minute there.”
“Can I do anything to help you with dinner, hon?”
Katie’s eyes open wide. She knows she’s losing her mind now. “Really, well you could set the table, dinner is almost ready.”
Ron gets the dishes and starts setting the table. “Hey, Honey, can I get you a beer or anything? I think I’ll have a cold one.”
“Really, well, I would like a glass of wine; that would be nice, Ron.”
“Sure, coming right up.” Katie can hear him singing to himself. It sounds like. Let’s Get it On. Now, it all makes sense. That’s the song Ron always hums when he wants sex. Wow, he’s just unbelievable. On the other hand, at least he wants to spend time with her. Instead of going out with the boys or falling asleep on the couch, hammered.
After dinner, he offered to clean the table and put the dishes in the dishwasher. Katie thought he was laying it on thick but might as well take advantage.
“Sure, that would be great. I think I’ll take a bath. I’m exhausted. I had a rough day at work. Mr. Rathgab was on my back all day, telling Katie to do this and Katie to do that. Then he had the nerve to ask me to do some personal errands. I get sick of him. He thinks I’m his work wife or something.
When I finally get caught up, he drops about twenty files on my desk and says, make sure these get taken care of before you leave. Thanks, I have to leave, but my wife and I are going out to eat tonight. See you tomorrow.”
“Yeah, he’s a jerk, Katie, but how about forgetting about work for now and just spending some time together tonight? You know, quiet time. After your bath, you’ll be nice and relaxed. I’ll see you in our room in about an hour.”
Katie was a little pissed off at Ron because he never wanted to listen to her talk about her problems at work, but it was all right if he whined about his boss every night at dinner and on the weekends when he stayed home. He never listened to her at all. She decides to let it go this time. Maybe they could still have a good evening.
When Ron called out from their bedroom, Katie was getting out of the tub, ” Hey, could you make it quick? I only have about twenty minutes. I’m supposed to meet the guys for a beer and shoot some pool.”
Katie thought her head would explode, and she was so mad. She decides to give Ron a little surprise of her own. She puts on her sexiest nightgown and walks slowly into their bedroom.
She stands in the doorway and says, “Well, Ron, honestly, I’m starting to get a migraine. So we’ll have to spend some quality time together when the hell freezes over.
“What are you mad about now? I set the table. We had a nice dinner together. And now you have a headache and don’t have time for me. Well, there is no pleasing you, is there? Nothing is ever enough. So, see you later, don’t wait. I guess I’ll make it a boy’s night out.
Katie comes out of the bathroom in her flannel pajamas and an old robe. She decides to spend the night reading. As she’s getting comfortable in bed, she thinks that what she really ought to be doing is planning the rest of her life. And it’s abundantly clear that Ron isn’t interested in being part of it.
So, she removes her pen and notebook and starts making a list. Starting with a list of things that make her happy. Number one, find out what will make me happy in my life. That’s all she wrote, and it seemed like a great way to begin.