I was on my way to work driving on the Schuylkill Expressway. The traffic was backed up for about three miles bumper to bumper. It was a beautiful day out, the sun was shining, there was a cool breeze and so I decided I would roll down my back windows. And I made the mistake of taking in a deep breath of air. Only to find I was actually breathing in the car exhaust of hundreds of cars in front of me.
I started coughing and choking. At that moment I decided that I had all I was going to take of my mundane life. I have been driving this same road going to the same job for over ten years. I just could not take another minute of it. I saw an exit ahead of me and I took it.Â
I really didn’t have any clue what I was doing or where I was going. All I know is I wasn’t going to work today. I decided to head toward the Philadelphia International Airport. I turned on my GPS because I always get lost on my way to the airport. Well, not just to the airport I get lost every time I go anywhere I haven’t been before. The fact is I have absolutely no sense of direction. I spent most of my life making U-Turns because I would go in the wrong direction. And the other half of my life asking strangers for directions.
I follow the directions of the GPS on my phone. And then suddenly I remember that I don’t have my phone charger nor do I have any credit cards with me. I feel like screaming. Why oh why am I so forgetful? I don’t even have old age to blame it on. I’m just so disorganized. What in the world do I think I’m doing? It’s one thing to skip a day of work. But quite another to run away from my job of fifteen years. Not to mention I forgot all about my cat, Ivan the Terrible. Who would take care of him? I must have lost my mind or had a stroke or something.
I decide to pull off the next exit and stop at a fast-food restaurant and get some breakfast. Maybe I have low blood sugar or something. Yeah, that’s it low blood sugar. I see a McDonald’s up ahead and pull into the turning lane. I haven’t eaten at McDonald’s in years. I gave up junk food. I have to admit I loved McDonald’s fries. I decide that one Egg MC Muffin and a side of fries isn’t going to kill me. I pull into a parking spot and head for the door.
A kind of rough-looking character looks me up and down as I pass him in the doorway. I really detest when men look at women like objects. I feel like smacking him. Then I take a second look at him and decide that isn’t such a great idea. I continue into the restaurant and walk over to the line where you place your order. There aren’t too many people in there because it’s a workday. And most people will get a take-out breakfast sandwich and eat it on the way to work. Well, at least the hard-core junk eaters will. I used to be one of them and I hope I’m not on the slippery slide to eating take-out junk food again.
I get my order of fries and eggs MC Muffin and a hot coffee. I decide to eat in my car. So I head out to my car and beep open the lock and plop down in the driver’s seat. I shove about five fries into my mouth and all but swallow them whole. Oh, yeah they are deliciously salty and crunchy. I take a big slurp of coffee and almost burn my tongue off. I all but shout, “crap, my tongue.” And then I hear someone banging on my driver’s side window. I thought, was I yelling that loudly?”
I look out the window and it‘s the scary-looking guy that passed me on the way into the restaurant. I roll down the window a few inches.”Yeah? What is the problem?”
He taps on the window and mimes that I should roll the window down more. I think, no way, Jose. And I shake my head back and forth. He yells, “open it or I’ll make you sorry you were ever born.”
Now I’m shaking in my boots. I’m about to pull away when he bangs on the window, hard. And not only that he‘s pointing a gun at me. I’m about to put my car in reverse when I see him cock the trigger. I think, maybe I’m still in bed dreaming. This isn’t really happening. And then why? Why me?”
He is looking straight into my eyes and he has his face pressed up against my window. and he says, “open the door, or I’ll shoot you and take your car.”
I look around and I don’t see anyone in the immediate vicinity who could help me. I open the door a crack. He says, “move over, I’m driving.”
And the next thing I know I’m in the passenger seat and he’s driving with his left hand and he is pointing the gun with his right hand directly at my face.
“Let me go, take the car. You don’t need me. I won’t call the police. You don’t need a hostage.”
“Don’t tell me what to do lady. I had enough of people telling me what I should or should not do.”
“I’m not trying to tell you what to do, only that I will just be an added burden and that you can make a faster get-away without me. I promise I won’t call the police. Just let me go.”
I know I said I was tired of going to the same job and I wanted to have a more interesting and challenging life. But really, this is not what I had in mind. As I sat there thinking this might be my last day on earth. I looked over at this low-life savage and I thought no way, no way in hell that this neanderthal is going to kill me today or any other day.
And that is when I saw that there was a traffic jam ahead of us and that the cars were almost completely stopped about ten cars ahead of us. I knew that when we came to a stop I was going to get the hell out of Dodge and out of this 2003 Mitsubishi, someway, somehow.
And at that moment that my car started to slow down almost to a halt I quietly grabbed a hold of the car handle and pushed through the car door open and propelled myself out of the car and rolled onto the tarmac. And by some miracle, no car ran over me. I jumped up and ran as fast as I could on the highway until I saw a police car about twenty feet ahead of me. And I started screaming at the top of my lungs, “help, help a man hijacked me and my car. Help, help, help.“ I saw a cop walking towards me. And he said in a matter-of-fact way, “what’s seems to be the trouble lady. It isn’t safe to be jogging on the highway are you trying to get yourself killed?”
I looked at him with my eyes almost popping out of my head. “I’m not jogging on the highway officer. I and my car were hijacked at the McDonald‘s when I stopped to get an Egg Muffin and French Fries. I haven’t had one in years. I know I’m babbling but this thug kidnapped me and my car. That’s my black 2003 Mitsubishi back there about ten cars. And the guy driving it is a kidnapper. He threatened to kill me with a gun that he put right in my face.”
“OK, OK I want you to get in my vehicle and calm down we will arrest this guy and you will get your vehicle back as soon as possible. He opens up the back door and I hop in as fast as I can. By now there are a lot of people watching as the traffic was stopped and they were all bored of looking at the vehicles in front of them. In fact, some of them had their heads hanging out of the car windows and are waving at me. I put my head down low as I didn’t want to see my face on Social Media anytime soon.
And I keep my head down. And then a terrible thought crosses my mind. Are they going to arrest that thug and throw him in the back of the car with me? I said, “No way in hell” out loud. And that’s when I start to open the back door of the car and attempt to get out and yell, “don’t put that monster in the car with me.”
Another police car had pulled up next to the car I was in and the cop in it got out and came over and said, “get back in dear lady, before you get hurt. The guy that stole your car has been arrested and he’s on his way to jail. Your car is being towed to headquarters. As soon as you get to the police station you will give a report of what happened today. And you and your vehicle can be on your way. You will be called to testify against him when he has his day in court. Do you understand?”
” I look up at him and think “yeah, I understand buddy.” But I just nod my head up and down a couple of times. And then I sit back in the chair and think about the turn of events that happened to me. I decided I really didn’t want a life where I never knew what was going to happen on any given day. I like to feel safe and secure. Not in fear of losing my life. But what I did need was a vacation and that is what I was going to do when I finally got to my job. Tell my boss I need a vacation as soon as possible. And I would come back a new woman.
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Great story. Not exactly what I was thinking about wanting a change.