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ALL IN A DAY’S WORK

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It had been a long, long day for Marie. She wearily plops down on the worn and tattered seat. Her legs and feet ached from the eight hours of standing in one place. Add to that the mind-numbing experience of making sandwiches all day, day after day for five years.

She stares out the dirty bus window wishing that one day she would wake up and find herself somewhere else doing anything else other than making sandwiches for forty hours a week at minimum wage.

Marie must have drifted off to sleep for a while

because when she woke up, there was someone’s head nestled on her left shoulder. And not only was he sleeping and snoring, but he was also drooling. Ordinarily, Marie tried to treat everyone with kindness. But this was just too much. And she gave the man a mighty shove, and his head flopped over in the other direction, and some old man accidentally smacked into him while he was walking down the aisle.

The sleeping man woke up with a start and yelped. His eyes popped open. He had no idea what had happened to him, but his neck and back hurt suddenly. He didn’t know if he was hurt intentionally or accidentally. But he was not happy. He yelled out as loudly as possible. “what the hell is happening?” Several people snickered, and the rest put their heads down. They learned over their many years of riding public transportation that it was better to keep your head down and mind your own business if you knew what was good for you.

Now everyone had their head down now as the injured man ranted and raved at anyone and everyone. “If I find out who done this to me, I will kick their ass up and down Federal Street. I will make you sorry for the day you were born. You are a dead man; I promise you that.” Then he stood up and looked around the whole bus as if he could detect who the wrongdoer was by sight or by smell, perhaps.

Marie was afraid of what would happen next. She regretted her behavior the moment after shoving the man’s head off her shoulder. Marie had never acted like that before. She wanted to apologize, but it was too late. She shrunk down into her seat and tried to disappear. She considered pulling the cord to stop the bus so she could get off before things got out of hand. It seemed as if many of the other passengers had the same idea as there was suddenly a mass exodus from the bus at the next stop. The man was eyeing everyone closely to see if he could determine who the culprit was.

Marie tapped her victim on the shoulder and said, “excuse me, but this is my stop. Would you mind if I got off now?”

He said, “what? Oh, you want to get off. Did you see who pushed me?”

“No, I didn’t. I hope you are alright? Can I get past you, please?”

The man stood up and let her pass. Marie hoped she never had to see him again. She certainly learned a lesson. As she descended the steps to the sidewalk, everyone on the bus looked at her. Because the regulars knew this wasn’t her stop. And they realized that either she was the one who pushed him, or she was terrified to sit next to him any longer.

He seemed intent on finding out who shoved him. Marie waited for the bus to continue down the street and then waited at the corner to take the next bus to her usual stop. Her heart was still pounding from fear. But she had learned a lesson for sure. Keep your head down and your hands to yourself no matter what happens.

When she finally arrived at her stop and took a deep breath. What a terrible day it had been. It certainly set a new low. As Marie walked down the street towards her apartment, she thought I have to make a change. I can’t go on like this anymore. Life is too short. Marie arrives at the door to her apartment building and unlocks it, and steps inside.

Her apartment is on the second floor. She gets her mail and starts walking up the steps. She is so thoroughly disheartened that she doesn’t know if she has the energy to climb the steps. She has to stop twice to take a deep breath and finally makes it. Marie unlocks her door and steps inside. It feels like she has been gone for a week instead of a day.

Marie takes her coat off and throws it over the back of her couch. And plops down in the middle, and she immediately realizes that she forgot about the spring under the middle cushion sticking up, and she yelps from the sudden, unexpected pain. “Well, serves me right,” Marie says out loud.

Marie knows she should look in the refrigerator for something to eat for dinner. But she decides to heat a can of soup in the microwave. She opens the cabinet and realizes that she needs to go food shopping and the one and only remaining can is beans. Marie knows beans will upset her stomach and her stomach is already in a knot. And she doesn’t want to be up all night from a stomach ache.

Marie doesn’t hold out much hope for something to eat in the refrigerator, but she takes a look anyway. She finds a hot dog but no hot dog roll. There is a hamburger roll, so she nukes the hot dog, cuts it in half, and shoves it into the hamburger roll. When Marie takes a seat at her kitchen table, she almost falls onto the floor because she forgot about the broken leg on her chair.

Marie stares at the hot dog in the hamburger roll and decides she deserves better than this. She has worked hard every day of her life since she aged out of the foster care system at seventeen. She tosses the hot dog sandwich into the trash, grabs her purse, and heads to the door. She closes the door behind her and heads back down the steps. Her stomach is growling with a vengeance now since she hasn’t eaten a thing all day.

As Marie steps back outside her apartment building, she looks to the right and the left. She sees a sign down the street that says, “GRAND OPENING.” She heads in that direction. The street is crowded with people headed home from work.

 She’s almost at the new shop when she hears someone call out her name, “Marie, Marie wait up.” She turns around to see who is calling her name and it is one of the tenants from her apartment building. She can’t remember her name. She decides to wait up for her. Marie suddenly recalls the woman’s name is Sarah. She doesn’t really know her. Even though they have both lived in the building for over ten years.

“Hello, Marie are you going to eat at the new restaurant today?”

“Yes, I was. I don’t have any food left in my place and I don’t have the energy to go food shopping today.”

“Do you mind if I join you? I get so tired of eating alone and not having anyone to talk to.”

“Yes, sure. That would be nice. I get tired of eating alone too. There is a short line outside the restaurant. So, they stand there and wait their turn. “Well, it is a nice day outside at least. I hope we don’t have to wait too long. So, Marie, I don’t think I ever asks you before but where do you work?”

“I work in a sandwich shop.”

“What, your kidding? Do you like working there?”

“No, I’m sick of making sandwiches all day. I should look for another job that pays more. It just seems like by the end of the day I just don’t have any energy.”

“I hear you. I felt that way for a long time and then I decided to start looking for a new job that paid better. It took me about a month I applied for every job in the area that had an opening. And I finally found a great place to work.”

“You did? What kind of job did you find?”

“Well, I found a job working in a shelter for homeless people. I know that sounds depressing but I love it. I feel like I’m really making a difference in other people’s lives. And I realized that my life isn’t as bad as I thought. I have a nice apartment, I can pay my bills. I have my cat who keeps me company.”

Marie looks at Sarah and says.” I guess you’re right. Things could certainly be worse. It must be awful not to have a place to live or even a place to sleep every day. I can’t imagine how stressful that must be.”

“Oh good, it’s our turn to get a seat. I could eat a horse, Sarah. I’m that hungry.”

Sarah laughs and says, “well I don’t think that will be on the menu.” And they both sit down at the nearest empty table and pick up a menu.

“You’re right Sarah it’s not on the menu. But spaghetti and meatballs are and that’s my favorite dinner.”

“You’re kidding mine too. I’m so glad I ran into you today. I don’t know why we never did this before.”

“Hey, they serve wine here. Would you like to share a bottle, Marie?”

“Well, I’ll have a glass maybe, I haven’t eaten all day and I rather not get drunk. I’m not used to drinking.”

“So Marie, there is an opening at the shelter do you think you like to come to fill out an application. The pay is pretty good and there are health benefits too. All the people that work there are nice. What do you think, interested?”

“Well, I don’t know. What am I saying, of course, I’m interested. I hate my job. It’s boring and tedious. I have to stand all day. Yes, please. Can I give them your name as a reference? Believe it or not, I don’t really know that many people even after living here for ten years. I just go to work and come home. I rarely go anywhere except food shopping.”

“Well, Marie you won’t be bored working there. And like I said, everyone that works there is nice. They care about other people. And at the end of the day, you feel like you are really making a contribution and helping people. Oh good here comes dinner.”

They both eat quietly, Marie said, “wow, that was so good and the prices are great. maybe I should go out to eat more often.”

“Well, I would like to go out to eat more often too. So how about you and I plan on going to eat together at least once a week?”

“Really, Sarah that would be great. Let’s see what’s for dessert. Marie picks up the menu again and says,” Cheesecake. I haven’t had that in years.”

“Oh, I love that too. Order two, my treat. Say, Marie, I’m on a bowling team and we are down one person. She moved to New Jersey. Do you play?”

“Well, when I was a kid, I was in a bowling league. But that was a long, long time ago.”

“So, it’s great fun. How about it? We meet every other Thursday night at the Bowlarama on 4th street. We can take the bus from the corner?”

‘Really, that sounds fun. Yes, I would love that.”

“Wow, that cheesecake was the best. How about taking a walk. It’s such a nice night? You can tell me about your day.”

“My day well, it was boring as usual until the bus ride home. Well, that’s a long story I’ll tell you while we’re walking…..

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DOING THE RIGHT THING IS ALWAYS THE RIGHT CHOICE

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Being the odd one out, the weird one isn’t fun at all. For as long as I can remember people have told me I was a little weird. And the truth of the matter is I just never “fit in”.

photo by John S Fllaherty

I didn’t really fit in with my family or at school. I haven’t been able to determine just what it is about me that makes me different from anyone else. But having said that the fact of the matter is I like myself. I’m intelligent and kind and creative and funny. I’m honest to a fault. Maybe that is my main problem I’m honest to a fault. And I decided long ago that people are going to like me or not.

And I’m not going to change who I am to please other people.  Life has thrown me quite a few curveballs. Because of the downturn in the economy I’ve had to change jobs several times in the last couple of years. You know the saying the last one hired, the first one fired. Well, I’m now on my third new job in a year and a half.

One of my many quirks is that I absolutely hate being late. I’m always, always early. So here I am in the still empty parking lot of my new job at Bowman and Sons. I’m an accountant I have a head for numbers. And I’m a perfectionist. In fact, that is how I lost my last position. I was doing my monthly oversight of the company’s books and low and behold I found a discrepancy. And it wasn’t a nickel here and a nickel there it was over a hundred thousand dollars. The funds were moved from one account to another. I checked and re-checked it and it was clearly not just an error. But an intentional attempt to steal money from one account and then it was deposited into another.

I can not tell you the number of times I went over and over these accounts. And no matter how many times I checked the results were always the same. Someone was embezzling.

And now I have only to establish who the embezzler is. And what steps I have to take once I have proof. It’s clear it was someone at the top of the pyramid not at the bottom. It’s clear that whoever was stealing the money had been doing it over a long period of time. And I was going to establish without a doubt who it was and they were going to pay the price for their crime.

The worse aspect of embezzling is that it is a betrayal of trust. And that my friend is something I can not and will not tolerate. I began creating a plan that would establish who the low-life scalawag is. And when I do I will make sure this culprit is punished to the full extent of the law.

I have worked overtime for the past month in my pursuit of this culprit. And I believe I’m very close, very close. And I will only be satisfied if this criminal is charged with a Federal crime. And he or she and will serve a full twenty years in Federal prison. And when and if they survive that they will be fined a minimum of a $50,000.00 fine. I look forward to that day like a kid looks forward to Christmas day.

Eureka, I have finally followed the paper trail, and arrived at my pot of gold so to speak, the crook, the thief. And you will not believe this but it is none other than the vice-president of our firm. And today I’m going to contact the federal authorities with my proof. And then my friends the shit will hit the fan.

I worked through lunch. I received a text stating that the authorities would be arriving at my office before the end of the day. My stomach was doing flip-flops. Why? You may ask. Because one of the original partners of this firm is the embezzler. He is an affable guy and I knew it was going to be a bitter pill to swallow when everyone found out that he has been stealing funds from this company for a long time. Probably since day one.

Probably the majority of people aren’t going to believe he is a thief. But numbers don’t lie. And I don’t lie, I’m incapable of lying. Even if it would benefit me to lie. If someone asks me how they look in their new suit and they look terrible. I tell them, it looks awful on you. So, you can see how some people might prefer that you lie to protect people’s feelings or keep them out of trouble. I can not do that.

I hear some kind of a commotion in the outer offices. I look up and see three men walking toward me. I don’t recognize them. But, I do know a cop when I see them. Even if they’re wearing a three-piece suit. I think at first they were going to walk right up to me. I break out in a sweat. And I think, well this is going to be my last day at this job. I better start looking for a new job.

But they didn’t even glance at me. They walk right past me and toward the main meeting room. The agent taking the lead opens the door and walks right in and asks, “Mr. Edward Robinson my name is Agent Michael Lombardi can you please step outside we need to speak to you privately. “

Mr. Robinson’s face turns bright red. He couldn’t even get a word out. Then I see him gulp and hear him clear his throat and he says, “what the hell is this all about?”

“Mr. Robinson, I’d rather not do that in front of everyone but if you insist I will. Mr. Edward Robinson, you are under suspicion for embezzling. Which is a Federal crime. I’m going to read your rights to you. “You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. “

Then Mr. Robinson swallows again and says, “I want to talk to my lawyer. I haven’t committed any crime. This is total crap.”

And that is the last thing I hear him say. Until the day I sit in the courtroom as a witness to testify to his crime of embezzling. And that is all they wrote folks, you do the crime, you do the time.

The next morning I’m called into the head pardner’s office. I have no doubt that they’re going to fire me. The partner’s assistant buzz me on the phone and asks if I would be so kind as to go to the meeting room. As I walk toward the meeting room I feel as if I’m about to show up for my own lynching. When I walk through those double doors I start sweating. And as I step in front of the meeting table all the members of the board stood and clap. I look behind me to see what they are clapping for? And there is no one else, just me.

“What’s happening?” I say to no one in particular.

“You are Mr. Miller. You are. We’re honoring you. Because you did your job. You were not afraid and stood up and did the right thing. You have probably saved our company millions of dollars by following the money trail and contacting the Feds before Mr. Robinson robbed us blind. You are getting a raise and a promotion. And it is our sincere hope that you will continue to serve our company for all the years to come. Congratulations.

And that my friends was the beginning of the rest of my life. And all because I believe that you must, stay focused on your mission, remain steadfast in your pursuit of excellence, and always do the right thing.

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TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE

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I met someone so unique and so special. She changed me for the better. And it all began with her smile.

I met her by chance, really. If I had arrived at the park an hour earlier or an hour later, our paths might never have crossed. I recently moved to the area and didn’t know a soul. I had been unemployed for several months. And then finally, finally, I received a call asking if I was still interested in a job I had applied for two months before. 

I barely remember applying for the job. I could paper the walls with all the rejection letters I received for my job applications. Anyway, I think this job has something to do with selling high-risk auto insurance. Not my dream job, of course, but when you’re desperate and need to pay your rent and keep body and soul together, you can’t afford to be that picky.

The interview is scheduled for today at ten o’clock sharp. They told me not to come too early or late because they had interviews scheduled back to back. I decided it would be better to arrive early and wait than to arrive late and miss out on my job interview.

I had to take public transportation to get to the office for the job interview. My car broke down several weeks ago. It turned out that the transmission needed to be replaced. I don’t have the money in hand, nor did I have a credit card that isn’t maxed out.

I took the bus across town that would bring me closest to my destination. As I arrived,i t started to drizzle. I glanced at my watch and realized I was a half-hour early for my appointment. I didn’t bring my umbrella, so I just pulled my jacket hood up over my head.

As I stepped down from the bus, I noticed a park bench that was situated under a large flowering tree and thought it might offer some protection from the rain until it was time for my interview.

I walked across the grass towards the tree, and I noticed there was someone about to sit down on the bench. The rain started coming down harder, and I picked up my pace and ran toward the bench.

I was out of breath by the time I arrived and more than a little damp. I plopped down on the bench and took a deep breath. I kept thinking, why, oh why do I have such bad luck?

Apparently, I said it out loud without realizing it, and the girl sitting next to me turned toward me and said, “Hello, my name is April. How are you today?”

I was somewhat taken aback by her appearance at first. She had straight brown hair, parted in the middle, with bangs high above her eyebrows. Her eyes looked somewhat unusual. They were tilted up somewhat. At first, I thought she might be Asian. But I couldn’t put my finger on just what made her face so unusual.

I’m not the most socially outgoing person, and ordinarily, I don’t feel comfortable talking to strangers. But there was something about her face, her smile that is so welcoming, so endearing that I couldn’t imagine not answering her. She seems so open, so innocent somehow. Although I can see now as  I‘m looking at her more closely, she isn’t a child at all but a young adult. She has narrow shoulders. Her hands are small, almost like a child’s, and folded in her lap. And I can see that she’s petite, less than five feet tall.

She smiles again, a sweet smile. The smile reaches her eyes. I smile back at her. Her smile is contagious. I can’t remember the last time I smiled. I have been so distracted by my unemployment and lack of funds in the last months.

I have always been told I was reticent. In other words, I’m not the type of person that starts having conversations with people I don’t know. I realize now that’s probably the reason I haven’t made any friends since I moved here.

I say, “hello, April, my name is Jeanie.” At first, I’m so shocked by the fact that I’ve spoken to her that I laugh out loud. And then she laughs too. Then, we were both laughing at what I don’t know.

She says, “I have an umbrella.” And she picks up her umbrella that had been resting next to her feet. “Would you like to share it with me?”

“Really? Yes, I really would. I have a job interview across the street in about a half-hour.  I forgot my umbrella, and I really don’t want to go in there soaking wet.”

She smiles again and moves closer to me so I can share her umbrella. I hear her humming under her breath. It sounds like When April Showers Bring May Flowers. I can’t remember all the lyrics but I find myself humming along with her.

She looks over at me and says, “I hope you get the job.”

“Thank you, I hope I do too, I really need it.:

She says, “I will keep my fingers crossed for you.”

I smile at her again. I can’t remember the last time anyone said that to me. Probably when I was a kid. In fact, there’s something childlike about her. As if she hadn’t been tainted by the thousand negative experiences, we all have as we grow from children to adults.

I look over at her, and I can hear her still humming quietly to herself as she looks around the park. I look in the direction she’s staring, and I realize she’s watching three kids about eight or nine years old. They’re swinging on the swings and going up and down the sliding board, over and over again. They keep yelling out “yey” every time they slide down the sliding board.

I can see her mouthing “yey” when the girls yell. She seems to be enjoying it almost as much as they do. I watch her in wonder and think who is this young woman?

After about fifteen minutes of watching the kids, I realize I better be on my way to my interview. I stand up and say,” April, I just want to say thank you for sharing your umbrella with me. I enjoyed meeting you so much.”

“Oh, do you have to go?”

“Well, April I have to go on that job interview I was talking about earlier. Wish me luck.”

“Good luck, Jeanie. I  know for sure you’ll get that job.”

I headed toward my interview with a lighter heart than I had arrived and sat down on the bench in the park. I walk across the street to the office building through the swinging doors and up to the receptionist’s desk.

“Hello, my name is Jeanie Haskell. I have an appointment with Mr. Peabody for a job interview.”

“Oh, yes Ms. Haskell, I see a note here, it says you are to go straight to his office. His office is number 254. Just take the elevator up to the second floor and make a right and walk down the hall until you see office number 254.”

“Thanks so much. Wish me luck I’m applying for a job.”

She looks up at me and smiles, good luck Ms. Haskell, I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

I wave at her and smile and walk toward the elevator across the room. As I walk over there, I start thinking what in the world is going on with me? Wish me luck.

And then I think, well, she was so friendly to me, maybe because I talked to her like she’s a person just like I am. Everyone wants to be treated with respect and kindness. In the past, I rarely talked to people unless I absolutely had to. I was always afraid that they would ignore me or reject me. Maybe I’m the one that has to change how I interact with people I meet.

I arrive on the second floor without any incident. I’ve always been somewhat frightened by elevators. I hate the closed space, and the possibility that it might fall and crash and I’ll be killed. And then I start laughing because even if it fell it would only go to the first floor or maybe the basement and I wouldn’t die.

The elevator doors open after the bell rings and I step out and look from right to left. I see an office marked 254 to my right and walk over to it. I take a deep breath and open the door. I walk over to the receptionist and say, “Good afternoon, my name is Jeanie Haskell. I have an appointment with Mr. Peabody.”

“Yes, we’re expecting you. You’re right on time. Do you have your resume with you?”

“Yes, I have it right here.” And I take it out of my purse and hand it to her.

“Well, Miss Haskell, have a seat it will just be a few minutes.”

“Thank you.” And then I sit down across the room from her desk. I take a deep breath. And I say to myself, so far, so good. At least the waiting room isn’t packed with twenty other people applying for the same job.

About five minutes later, the receptionist called out my name. “Ms. Haskell, Mr. Peabody will see you now.”

I walk up to Mr. Peabody’s door, and as I’m about to open it, I turn around and say, “thank you, Miss Turner.” I had noticed her nameplate sitting on her desk.

“Good luck, Ms. Haskell.”
I knock quietly on the door. And I hear a deep male voice call out, “Come right in.”

I take a deep breath and quietly pull the door open. There’s a thirty-something man sitting at his desk, which is piled high with folders. “Good morning you must be Ms. Haskell, have a seat.”

“So, thank you for coming in today. I see here in your resume that you have some experience that might be beneficial to my business. However, there has been a recent gap in your work history. Would you care to explain that?”

“Well, my mother was sick, and I had to take considerable time off to take care of her. And then I couldn’t find a job. Well, that’s not entirely true, I found quite a few openings but there was so much competition for the jobs. I had that big employment gap and that made it more difficult to get hired.”

“Yes, I can see how that would and does happen. Do you feel that you are able to be a reliable employee now? Or do you think you will still be missing work because of your mother’s health issues?”

“No, I don’t. My mother passed away. And that is when I began searching for a job full-time. But I haven’t had any luck. I promise you I will be a reliable and trustworthy employee. I’m a hard worker.”

“Yes, I can see that all your past employers said you had been a highly reliable and diligent worker. Have you ever sold high-risk auto insurance.? I don’t recall seeing that on your resume.”

“No, but I have had jobs with customer service and sales. And I don’t think that selling high-risk auto insurance would be that different from my past work experience.”

“I agree, are you able to start working immediately, say this coming Monday?”

“Yes, I can start today, if you like.”

“No, I think Monday would be just fine. Would you ask Ms. Turner to give you the forms that you will need to fill out before you leave? I look forward to working with you Ms. Haskell. I’ll see you at 9 am sharp on Monday.”

As I left his office I sighed with relief. I somehow feel lighter and less weighed down by worry. When I arrive at Ms. Turner’s desk, she said,” Well, Congratulations Ms. Haskell. “I had a good feeling about you. Here’s the paperwork. You can sit over at that desk and fill out the papers and then bring them back to me.”

“Thank you, Ms. Turner. I’ll take care of that right now.”

After I finished the paperwork, I brought it back to Ms. Turner with a big smile on my face. Thanks so much. I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Thank you too, by the way, my name is Kerry. I look forward to it.”

“See you then, Kerry.”

I take the elevator down to the first floor. Honestly, I feel twenty pounds lighter. As I walk across the street, I decide to talk to the young woman sitting on the bench. She waves at me as I came closer to her.

“Hi!” she says with that smile of hers that goes from ear to ear.

“Hello, I just wanted to let you know that I got the job. She smiles again and says, “I was about to eat my lunch. I have two peanut butter sandwiches; would you like one?”

“Well, I didn’t have any breakfast. Are you sure?”

“Yes, I always bring an extra one for a friend, just in case. You can sit here with me and eat it.”

“I would love that, April. I haven’t had lunch with a friend for a long time. Do you eat here often?”

“Well, yes I do, I come here for about an hour every day until it’s time for me to take the bus home. Here’s your sandwich, and you can share my drink too.”

I take the sandwich gratefully. ” Thanks, April. So tell me about yourself. How far do you live from here?”

I take the 424 bus until I get to my street and then I get off and walk a block to the second building on the left number 63 Harrington St.”

“Oh, this sandwich is great, I don’t remember the last time I had peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I used to eat it all the time when I was a kid. Thanks, April. Maybe we could eat together again sometime. I’ll bring lunch. What do you say?”
“I say great, I like cheese too, or peanut butter and jelly.”

“Well, how about next Monday at noontime? When  I have my lunch break?”

“Yes, I would like that. It’s good to make a new friend.”

“Yes, yes, it is April, and today was my lucky day when I met you and got a new job. I think you are my lucky charm from now on. I’ll see you then.”

As I walk toward my bus stop, I turn around and wave at April she’s watching the kids again, I wave at her and smile. I realize she’s the one who put a smile back on my face. I look forward to spending more time with her. I find myself humming When April Showers Bring May flowers and smiling from ear to ear.

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DAY ONE

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It was the first day of my new job. Would there never be an end to the first days? I have bad luck. Things never work out for me. It seems as if each position is one rung lower on the ladder of success. I’ve decided to do my very best at this job. Perhaps I’ll be able to move up the ladder instead of down. We’ll see, hope springs eternal.

Elementary School Cafeteria

Elementary School Cafeteria

I walk into the front door of the school to the principal’s office. I had come here for the initial interview, so I know the basic layout of the building. I studied the building map all last night as well. So, I feel pretty confident that there won’t be any problem.

In the past, I have had trouble with buildings like this, long narrow hallways with rooms jutting off in every direction. Everything looks the same. I would get lost in the maze of hallways and look-alike rooms. God, why is everything the same color? Oh, wait there’s the sign for the principal’s office. I’m fine.

I walk up to the long narrow reception desk only to discover that there’s a swarm of people ahead of me. Oh no, this won’t do. I can’t be late. That will set off a chain reaction for me that could only end in disaster.

“Hello, hello, miss. Can you tell me where I should go? It’s my first day working here. Am I supposed to speak to the principal or go directly to the cafeteria?”

No response, apparently this incompetent woman is unable to discern the importance of my question. And she is allowing all these bungling baboons to take her attention away from me. I push my way past two of the teachers and speak in a stern voice. “I said, can you please tell me where I’m supposed to report. It’s my first day working in the cafeteria?”

“What’s your name? Can’t you see I’m busy, and all these people were ahead of you?”

“Of course, I can see that. I’m not blind. Just tell me where I’m supposed to go and I’ll be on my way. Even you must be able to understand such a simple dilemma.”

” Go directly to the cafeteria, and speak to the supervisor, Ms. Nolan. She’ll tell you what to do. Do you know where the cafeteria is? If not, there is a map of the school on the wall.”

“Of course, I know where it is. What kind of fool do you take me for?”

She isn’t listening anymore. So, I head out of the office and down the hall in the direction I think the cafeteria is located. Unfortunately, I‘m wrong, and end up in the gym. I find the janitor sweeping the floor. He tells me how to get to the cafeteria. I’m starting to feel a bit flustered. By the time I arrive at the cafeteria I’m ten minutes late. Stupid, stupid bureaucracy, this is how it always turns out.

I rushed into the kitchen and asked a gray-haired old cow, where is Ms. Nolan?”

“Oh, so you’re the new worker, she’s not going to be happy about you being late. She’s a stickler for being on time. She told me to get you started on the breakfast trays. I’ll show you how it’s done. You’ll be fine. Let’s go this way. I’m Nancy by the way. We’ll be working together. ”

“Ok, Nancy I’m sure. You will only need to show me once. I’m a quick learner.”

Nancy shows me where everything is. And I start setting up the trays. Easy peasy. I don’t know what else I’m supposed to do and I don’t see Nancy anywhere. So, I start looking around the kitchen and the pantry, and the freezer. After looking around, I decided that things need to be organized.

I start in the pantry with dry goods. I check the expiration dates on all the cans and put all the oldest ones in front. I put canned fruit together, canned tuna, etc. I was working up quite a sweat. I even cleaned off all the shelves and the tops of the cans. I take a step back and look at my handiwork. I‘m quite proud of myself. I‘m sure Ms. Nolan will be quite impressed. Where is she anyway?

I stroll out into the cafeteria to look for her, and what’s her name, Nancy.

“Where have you been? Ms. Nolan is fit to be tied? The early breakfast kids have already come and gone. Ms. Nolan had to help. You are really up Shit’s creek. She hates waiting on the kids. She hates to come out of her office altogether. Jeez, I wouldn’t want to be you. You better double step it into her office right now. It’s that door over there.”

I walk over to the office and knock confidently at the door. I’m sure Ms. Nolan will understand that I was using my time efficiently since no one had told me to do otherwise. I’m sure she’ll appreciate my efforts in putting things to right.

“Come in, come in. Oh, it’s you. Where in the hell have you been? Nancy tells me you were late, and then you disappear altogether.”

“Well I appreciate your concern, but I finished the breakfast trays, and then I reorganized the pantry. Nancy didn’t tell me that I was supposed to serve them as well. Would you like to see the pantry? I’m sure you will appreciate the changes I’ve made.”

“Changes, who said you were allowed to make changes? I have been working in this school system cafeteria for thirty years. I set up the entire kitchen, pantry, and schedule. You had no business changing anything. Don’t ever again take it upon yourself to change our system. It works very well. Do you understand?”

“Understand, yes, but I think you’ll see how much improved it is now. If you would take a moment to look.”

‘”Think, who told you to think? You do as you’re told. Now go back to the kitchen. Nancy will show you the meal schedules and how to use the cash register system. That’s all, good day. I hope I will have no further problems with you.”

I back out of the office. I‘m shocked. I can tell you. Why the unmitigated gall of that little tyrant telling me that I wasn’t there to think. What does she think I’m some kind of automaton?

I walk briskly over to Nancy. She has a self-satisfied expression on her face. I have to use all my self-control to keep from wiping that expression off her face with the back of my hand. I get myself under control and say, “sorry for any trouble. It won’t happen again. Ms. Nolan asked if you‘ll show me the meal schedules and how to use the register system.”

“Right, right, let’s do that. It’s quite simple. We have the same breakfast every day; the lunches are on a rotating schedule. You’ll see.”

Nancy shows me the lunch schedule. Then she demonstrates the cash register to me. It doesn’t use cash at all. Each student has an ID card, which they swipe. And the cost of the meal is deducted from their account. Some kids have state-subsidized lunches, and they have a different kind of card.

When I look at the lunch menu, I think it can use updating. There’s only fast food and junk food. Shouldn’t the children be eating healthier foods?

“Nancy, what do you think about changing up the food menu? We can probably create healthier foods, and it would save money?”

“What are you crazy? Didn’t Ms. Nolan tell you that she set up this kitchen, the menu, and the budget? She will have your head if you change anything. You just got started here. Do you want to lose your job on the first day?”

“No, of course not. But I like to do the very best I can do at whatever I do. I think tonight I’ll make up a new menu and present it to Ms. Nolan tomorrow.”

“You’re out of your mind. But do what you want, many have come and gone before you. And I’m still here, and so is Ms. Nolan.”

The next morning, I walk through the school double doors full of optimism. I feel quite pleased with myself. Ms. Nolan will be so appreciative of my efforts. She’ll realize the meals are healthy and tasty and she can save money at the same time. I’m sure this is the perfect job for me. I walk through the cafeteria to the kitchen and over to Ms. Nolan’s office.

Nancy calls out, “Wait, where are you going? You are supposed to be helping me set up the breakfast trays.”

I nod at Nancy and rap sharply on Ms. Nolan’s door. It rattles. “Whose there? I’m on the phone. Come in, come in.”

I walk over to Ms. Nolan’s desk and hand her the new menus. I have a broad smile across my face.

Ms. Nolan says into her phone, “yes, I’ll take care of that right away.” She snaps the phone shut. “What is it? Can’t you see I’m busy?”

“Of course, I’ll only take a minute. I made up these new menus for the children’s lunches. I think you’ll find that they are quite an improvement over what you are using now. They’re nutritious, a good value, and easy to prepare.”

Ms. Nolan’s face turns bright red. She fairly rips the papers out of my hands. And without a how do you do, she tears the papers into shreds.

“This is what I think of your menus. I told you yesterday that this is my kitchen. You were to do as you are told, nothing more and nothing less. Now you can finish out the week, and then you are out of here.”

We’re a team, and I’m the head. You’re not a team worker. You’ll get your pay at the end of the week, and then you are out of here.

I’m so shocked that I turn on my heels and walk back to the kitchen and next to Nancy. I start preparing the trays for breakfast. I don’t look to the right or left. I can feel Nancy staring at me. But I don’t give her the satisfaction of saying anything.

“Well I tried to warn you, but you just wouldn’t listen.”

At the end of the week, I finish my shift and walk out the door, never to return. Things just never worked out for me. Everyone is always out to get me. I have bad luck. There’s nothing I can do about it. I keep saying these things over and over in my head like a mantra all the way home. Now I‘ll have to start looking for a new job. I‘ll have to try harder, that’s all. That’s all anybody can do.

THE BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH

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I was recruited in my senior year of College at Georgia Tech. My plan was to ultimately get a Masters Degree in Science and Technology. I’m smart; not genius smart but my IQ is somewhere up there in that stratosphere. I’m not bragging, just stating the facts, the facts and nothing but the facts.

But to achieve my goal, I needed money. My family was tapped out. A recruiter contacted me on campus and asked if I wanted to earn some real cash, working at the nearby Apple Store. Would I, of course I would. Any techie’s wet dream. Surrounded by the best of the best, creatives, mathematicians, hardware and software gurus. That’s the definition of who I am. I have been using a Macintoggle computer since I was five years old.

So, hell yeah, I took that job and swallowed the whole party line hook, line and sinker. On the final day of training I was unbelievably buzzed. I couldn’t wait to get on showroom floor and tell, nay educate customers about the latest Mac products including the Mac Super Pro with retinal display.

Just as my team was about to be released to start our new career, we were told on the downlow that there was a programming bug that had just been discovered recently. However, they were still going to launch the Mac Super Pro because so much time and money had been invested its production and promotion.

It was like being hit by a cold dead mackerel in the face. Selling substandard products. I just couldn’t believe it. In addition, if we failed to push Mac Super Pro, we were pretty much dead in the water.

I stumbled and mumbled my way out onto the floor. I felt dazed and bewildered. I needed the money. There was no if, and or buts. I had to do it. Sell product, after all I was just a guppy in a sea of bigger fish, sharks even.

I walked out there with my shoulders back and stomach in, like any good soldier going to fight the good fight. And then I saw her, walking into the store a tall blond athletic looking. Her face could launch a thousand ships. Maybe she wasn’t Helen of Troy, but a second runner up. Her pony tailed hair swung this way and that as she walked straight toward me. She wore a pair of black glasses that kept slipping down her nose. She kept pushing them back up with the heel of her hand. I was in love.

“Good morning, my name is James, how may I help you?”

“James is it? James Bond?”

I stared at her. Her eyes were indigo blue like the sea. I fell right into those eyes, and never wanted to leave. “What? Oh no, James, James Brown at your service.”

“Well, James, James Brown. I’m interested in the Mac Super Pro.”

I gulped, almost felt like I swallowed my tongue. I had to retrieve it before I could speak again. “Of course, it’s right over here. There isn’t anything else on the market that has the speed, versatility, and memory that the Mac has available.  It’s easy to use, really is intuitive. People friendly. Let me give you a demonstration.

She asked me questions that only another techie would know to ask. She wasn’t a techie virgin. I gulped again. I regurgitated everything that I had been instructed to tell a potential customer. I watched her face. She was impressed. I thought I was at the point where I could close the deal.

At that moment she said, “Oh one more thing, I have been hearing rumors on the forums that there is a possible programming problem with the Mac Super Pro, do you know anything about that?”

I looked her straight in those indigo eyes, and I said,” problems, none. This baby has been tested, checked, and rechecked. MacIntoggle has had it beta tested for six months before it was released. You have my word on it.”

“Alright then, let’s bag up this baby, and I’ll take it home right now.”

She walked out the door with her ponytail swinging left to right. I said to myself, job well done. I’m on my way making my mark in the world. I look to the door and in walked number two.