Tag Archives: gardening

THE MASKED BANDIT

It’s early Spring, and I’ve recently planted all the vegetables that I had started in my greenhouse outside. I can’t tell you how much I looked forward to eating freshly picked vegetables, tomatoes, peppers, and herbs.

Every morning I walk outside filled with anticipation, loving every minute of the hard work, the heat, the rain, the weeding. And watching the bees slowly buzzing over the plants and landing on the flowers that have recently bloomed. I imagine the bees are in some sort of drunken stupor from the overwhelming array of smells as they hover and land so lightly upon the plants that surround them.

I take a deep breath. I feel slightly lightheaded. Even though I have gardened almost the entirety of my adult life, I still feel the same joy I felt the first time I saw a plant growing and peeking out from the earth that was merely a tiny seed ten days before.

 The time flew by in what seemed moments, and I saw some of the watermelons growing larger by the day. I could almost taste their sweet nectar upon my lips. Every day that passed drew me closer to that moment when I could enjoy the fruits of my labor. And then the horror began.

One Saturday morning, I stepped outside on my screened-in porch, and I saw what appeared to be one of my watermelons in the middle of the yard. But how could that be? How in the world could that happen? This was the very watermelon that was so close to being ripe. It was huge. How could anything but a human being pick it up and carry it out into the middle of my yard? And then abandon it. What kind of warped individual would commit such a crime against nature, against me? Who, who would do it? I could not imagine.

 We live in a small community with only about twenty homes. And my neighbors made a practice of keeping to themselves. They rarely even pass the time of day if they see you outside in your yard. I was lucky if they even waved. After six years, I only knew the names of a few of our neighbors.

I slipped my gardening boots on and ran out into the yard in my pajamas I hadn’t even put on my gardening clothes. I was in such a shocking state of mind I forgot I hadn’t gotten dressed yet. I felt as if I was looking at the remnants of a murder committed in my own backyard.

I ran through the wet grass. It had rained heavily the night before. And looked down at my fallen watermelon. And it had huge bites taken out of it. I could not comprehend why anyone would do such a thing. It was bad enough that he or she would steal from my garden. But, to then take bites out of it and then leave it to rot in the middle of my backyard was impossible to take in. I was baffled.

I felt such anger well up in my heart in mind. I felt my temples throbbing, and my face felt flushed. The only time I felt this angry was when I was in my last year of college, and my teacher told me that my latest story was the work of a person who had no clue how to write or had any creativity. He failed me for the semester, and I had to retake the course. And then one of my classmates told me that self-same teacher just had a story published in a magazine. And it was almost an exact copy of my story word for word.

This is how angry I felt today. Someone had taken one of my creations that I worked and sweated for and destroyed it, desecrated it. I silently promised myself that I would seek revenge on whoever was responsible for this crime against nature.

When I returned back to my house, I called up my best friend Beth and told her the whole story. She listened quietly without interrupting. And then she said, “.Elizabeth, try and calm down; you’re going to have a stroke if you don’t calm down. Try to put this in perspective. It was just a watermelon. I’m sure that you planted more than one. I know how much you love gardening and look; the fruits of your hard work are like children to you. But think about it, you were going to eat it. And there will be another melon to take its place.”

“What? Just another watermelon. How can you say that? I planned my garden all winter. I spent hours and days preparing the soil, planting the seeds, watching them, and watering them. “

“You’re right, Elizabeth, but what’s done is done. You just have moved forward. Try not to let this affect you so much. Try to move forward. Maybe you could put some kind of net over the garden to prevent further damage.”

“You’re right, Beth. I will have to find a protocol to prevent this from ever happening. I will set up traps all over my yard if need be.”

“OK, don’t get carried away. You can be injuring any of your neighbors because of a watermelon, Beth.”

“Alright, I won’t harm anyone, but I will certainly put the fear of god into them if it’s the last thing I do on earth. I will make them regret the day they came into my yard, my garden, and designated it.”

“You are still sounding unhinged; go in your house, get a shower, get dressed, and eat some breakfast. Maybe your blood sugar is too low. And then call me later, maybe we could go out to dinner and a movie later. Take your mind off of the watermelon. Call me after your shower, and we’ll make plans, OK?”

I called Elizabeth later, and she wasn’t home. I left her a message and said I was calmed down and that maybe we could make plans for later in the week. I decided that I would have a surveillance system put on the exterior of my home, and I would find out who the culprit was. And when I did, I would make them regret the day they were born. The next day they arrived bright and early and set up the surveillance system. I could watch my yard anytime I wanted to, and somehow they had connected it to my cell phone, and I would be able to check out my yard 24 hours a day if need be. I was stoked.

If there were any signs of someone on my property, I would receive a message on my cell phone. For five days, there was nothing. But I remained on edge. I had trouble falling asleep and staying asleep. I was confident that whoever it was would return to rob me again. And so I waited and waited for something, anything to happen.

And then, on Sunday night, as I was sleeping soundly in my bed, my cell phone went off with a high-pitched sound that woke me from the first sound sleep I had had in almost a week. I nearly jumped out of my skin. I did jump out of my bed and looked out my back bedroom window that faced my garden. I saw nothing. It was pitch dark.

So, I put on my shoes and my robe to protect myself from the mosquitoes and headed out the back door. And low and behold, I saw someone or something moving. But, it was too small to be a human. What, what could it be? And then I saw four or five smaller shapes moving behind the larger one. Good lord, what could be going on? I couldn’t fathom it. I slowly moved toward the moving shapes. Trying to be as stealthy as I could, considering my size.

As I got closer to them, I pulled my small flashlight out of my pocket and shined the light on the moving shapes. And when I did that, I saw one large and five sets of smaller eyes glowing red in the dark night. The larger of the group stood up on his hind back legs, and low and behold. I saw before me a Raccoon. The largest one I’ve ever seen. Behind her were five smaller versions of her, baby raccoons.

They looked eerie in the flashlight, and as soon as they saw me, the mother raccoon made a weird squealing noise, and they all took off like bats out of hell towards the back fence. And off they went. If they ever returned, I saw little evidence of it. Every once in a while, there would be some missing vegetable but never a watermelon again. I decided I was willing to part with the odd vegetable or so. She did have a family to feed, after all.

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THE GARDEN OF EARTHLY DELIGHTS

It was hard to believe but the first day of Spring has finally arrived. Dahlia was so excited she was unable to fall asleep the night before. She spent her entire sleepless night planning her garden. How could she possibly sleep when she had so many decisions to make. It was true that she had worked diligently during the long, cold, and dark winter perusing all the seed catalogs and the internet.

She had drawn and redrawn the plans for her garden.

Dahlia didn’t know how many years she had left in her life. But she knew that as long as she had breath in her body that she would spend whatever time she had left either planning her garden or working in it. She could think of no better way to wile away the time she had left.

Dahlia could not comprehend why everyone wouldn’t love gardening. Working the soil with her hands, breathing the fresh and fragrant air all around her, and feeling the warm sun on her back. As she knelt in the rich soil and planted her seeds, seedlings were truly a gift. She could not imagine any other activity that would make her feel more alive or more in tune with nature.

She tried to explain to her friends why and how much she loved her garden. But those who never gardened couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to spend all their free time kneeling in the dirt and out in the hot sun. And all of her friends who loved gardening as much as she did couldn’t imagine not loving every minute of it.

Dahlia referred to her garden as the Garden of Earthly Delights. Because every moment she spent in her garden or thinking about it she was completely fulfilled and happy and in harmony with nature. Her mind would empty of worry and calm and focus on the tasks before her. All worry would disappear.

Last Spring and into the Summer Dahlia planned her Koi Pond. She had always dreamed of adding one to her garden and last year after saving for almost five years she was able to hire two young men who lived in the neighborhood to install one in her back yard in front of her back porch.

And she only had to walk down her steps and she was able to stand over her pond and watch the beautiful Koi and Shubunkins and Comets swimming gracefully in her pond. It was the most beautiful sight she could imagine.

Dahlia planted yellow Water Lilly’s. She loved to see her beautiful Koi poke their faces out of the water and try and capture the dragonflies as they touched upon the water ever so lightly. This year Dahlia planned to plant a white Hydrangea behind the pond.

One afternoon as she was weeding her garden in the backyard she heard a little voice call out, “Hi, hello, could I come into your yard and see your Koi pond? My mother said I couldn’t come over unless you said it was OK. And you were here. She’s afraid that I’ll fall into the pond and drown. But I wouldn’t because I would be really careful. Can I come in?”

Dahlia smiled at the little girl who looked like she was about five or six years old. She had long, blond hair that hung down to her shoulders and when the sun shined on it her hair looked like it was made out of gold. “Of course, let me come over and unlock the gate for you.” Then Dahlia walked over to the fence and smiled at the little girl. Her smile would light up the darkest of days and her eyes were a shade of blue that is hard to define. Somewhere between the color of the ocean and a cloudy day. “What’s your name, dear?”

“My name is Iris. My mother told me she named me that because my eyes were the same color as her favorite flower, the Iris. And that she carried a bouquet of blue irises when my mommy and daddy got married.”

“Really? Why they are my favorite flower too, what a coincidence. I’ll tell you what before you leave I’ll cut some Irises for you to take home to your mother. How would you like that?”

“Really? I would love that. It would make my mommy so happy. We just moved into the house at the end of the corner and there are hardly any flowers in the yard. My mom loves flowers and was sad that our new house didn’t have any flowers. But, I said, that I could help her plant some. Maybe even some blue Irises.”

“Oh, I’m so happy that house finally has a family living in it. It was empty for a long time. There was an older couple living in it for a long time. But they had to go to an assisted living residence.”

“What does that mean, assisted living?”

“Oh, sorry that just means a place for older people to live where they have people that help take care of them, if they can’t walk too well, or they are lonely or something like that.”

“Are you going to have to go to that place? I hope not because you’re the first friend I made so far and we’ve been living here for almost a week.”

“Oh, a week isn’t that long. Before you know it you will have a whole bunch of friends. There are a few children your age on this street alone. Plus when you start school you’ll make a whole lot of friends, don’t worry.”

“Really do you think so?”

“Of course Iris, I have no doubt you will make many friends in no time at all. How about we take a little walk and you can meet some of my fish. I’ll give you some fish food and they’ll come right up to the top of the water, you’ll see.”

As they walk across the yard towards the pond, Iris became more and more excited. “Can you introduce me to your fish? Do they have names?”

“Names, of course. You stand over here for a minute while I get some fish food. Don’t get any closer to the edge of the pond. It is really deep in some parts. OK? I’ll be right back. Dahlia double-times it to the porch to get some fish food and then all but ran over to Iris, she was afraid she might fall in the pond.

“OK, here we go, hold open your hand and I’ll put some fish food into it. The little girl smiled and opened up her hand. Dahlia couldn’t remember the last time she saw such a tiny hand. She rarely was around any little children since she and her husband were not able to have any kids.

“Alright, just drop some of the fish food into the pond, be careful near the edge. And then we’ll wait for a couple of minutes and the fish will start coming up. Iris did as she was told and before she knew it she saw the gaping mouth of a fish. He swallowed the food in a flash. And Iris laughed and said, “oh can I do it again? Who was that what’s his name?”


“Oh, that’s Finley, he’s my Koi, isn’t he beautiful? After he gets to know you, he will come right up to you and you will be able to drop the food into his big mouth.”

“Oh, here comes another one. He’s really fast.” And at that moment a fish jumped up out of the water and then went back in a blink of an eye. “What’s his name?”

“Oh, that’s Haley’s Comet. I named him after a Comet because he is so fast. And because he is a Comet which is a type of Koi. Throw him some fish food.”

Iris dropped several fish pellets into the water. And before you knew it Haley’s Comet had devoured the food and jumped back into the depths of the pond.

“Oh, I see little tiny fish in there. Are they babies?”

“Yes, there are quite a few, but I’ve never been able to count them because they swim around too quickly. Iris, does your mother know where you are? She might be wondering where you got to since you’re new to our neighborhood. How about we go and get your mom some Irises and then I’ll walk you back to your house. And I’ll say hello, and introduce myself to your mother?”

“Oh OK, I know my mom will be happy if you give her the flowers. She just loves them so much.”

“Alright, how about you come over here next to the deck and wait while I get some clippers to cut the flowers.”

Dahlia, grabbed her clippers from the back porch, and then she said, “Iris, why don’t you pick out the six Irises for me?”

“Really? OK.”

And then Iris stood there for a couple of minutes and carefully picked out the biggest and most beautiful flowers. “Oh, my mom will just love these.”

And then Iris and Dahlia started their short walk down the street to Iris’s new home. “Here it is, here it is. Isn’t it beautiful?”

“Yes, it is a truly beautiful new house. I know your family will be happy living here. It is such a friendly neighborhood and soon you will make some friends.”

“Oh, I already met my new best friend. It’s you, Dahlia.”

“That is the nicest thing anyone ever said to me, Iris.”

And before they knew it they arrived at the front yard of Iris’s house and her mother was standing outside on the front sidewalk.” Iris I was beginning to get worried about you. You shouldn’t have gone off without telling me where you were going? Oh, I’m sorry I should have introduced myself. I’m Iris’s mother. And you are?”

“I’m Dahlia, I live three houses down the street and Iris stopped by to say hello and she met some of my fish, in my Koi pond. I’m sorry if you were worried. I just wanted to stop by and say, “welcome to the neighborhood. I hope you will be very happy here. And I am so happy to meet Iris. She is welcome anytime, as long as she lets you know where she is going. And you are welcome anytime as well. Iris told me how much you love flowers and I would be happy to share some with you. Once you get settled in and have time to work in your garden.”

“Really? I did notice your house when we first came here to check out the house and we drove up and down the street. And I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful your garden is. And I’d love to stop by one day and take a look at all your beautiful flowers and of course your Koi pond as well. Oh, I forgot to introduce myself to you. My name is Rose, so I guess that is something we all have in common. We were all named after flowers. And we all love them.”

“That is funny, please feel free to stop by anytime. I warn you in advance I have a tendency to go on and on about flowers. One day after you get settled in, and have some free time, please stop by and see my garden and I’ll tell you where the best plant stores are located around here. I better be on my way, I’m sure you have tons of things to do and get unpacked. I look forward to your visit. Bye for now. Bye Iris, thanks for coming over. I hope to see you both soon. Dahlia waved goodbye and went on her way back to her house. She had a big smile on her face. It had turned out to be such a wonderful day. Rose and Iris waved bye to her as she turned to leave. And they were smiling as well.